Tonight I went to the goodbye party for Chris Elliott/welcome party for Andy Brown. I think Andy Brown really brings The Party to The Party, if you know what I'm saying, so I figured this was something worth paying $35 to attend. And because of that whole "donation" thing.

Oh, also because I think Garry Brown has sexy hamstrings.

Moving on. When I first walked up, I could hear a familiar voice coming across the loudspeakers and I asked my amigo, "Is Randi Shade speaking?" Turns out it was actually Jimmy LaFave singing one of his many songs that all start off sounding exactly the same as his big 2005 hit "Revival."

I was enjoying the sweet stylings of LaFave when suddenly the band burst into "Yankee Doodle Dandy" and costumed men sprung up from the bushes, marching in with flags and scrolls and I think even Elliot Naishtat. At first I thought it was a processional for Mark Strama's arrival, however it turns out it was just some sort of historical reenactment.

Yes, I said historical reenactment.


Reenactment of what, I haven't exactly figured out. I was too busy making snide remarks to anyone within earshot. Since when do you stop a party for a thirty-minute stage performance of...something? I think they read the Constitution or Eat, Pray, Love or something, but I'm not really sure. I do know it went on entirely too long and I think my friend from elementary school's dad was playing George Washington in it (so I'm totally sorry if you're reading this, but consider it karmic payback for the fact that you always had an American Girls doll and I never did).

The real kicker was when I glanced around just to observe other people's faces and saw poor Jimmy LaFave looking rejected, loitering by the cars by himself.


Being that I am classy like that, I went up to him and said "So I bet this is the first time you've shared a billing with John Adams?" LaFave turned out to be a pretty cool dude albeit completely baffled by what was going on (welcome to the Travis County Coordinated Campaign) and dare I say slightly miffed that he had to stand around through forty five minutes of Old English (and I'm not talking about malt liquor).

Finally our country's Founding Fathers 2.0 got off the stage and LaFave went back to plucking his guitar and I went back to observing. I was waiting for Kirk Watson to show up to speak, but by the time 9 PM rolled around and LaFave ended his set, Watson was nowhere in sight. Presumably he was home keeping track of Obama's accomplishments. Kirk Watson stood me up. But...Brian Pendleton was there, and so the $35 was totally worth it (TOLD YOU I'D DO IT!).