We currently have three weather advisories for most of central Texas (this includes a *certain* Dunndee who is living at a *certain* house in the Hood!):

Tornado Watch until 2 AM
Freeze Warnings until 12 PM tomorrow!
Winter Weather Advisory until 12 PM tomorrow!

Currently, I have my air conditioner on in the house and all the windows closed. It's 73 degrees outside (after climbing up to near 80 degrees today!) and uber-humid.

What a wonderful state!

The best part is that if the "Winter Weather Advisory" holds up, we will likely not have to go to into work until the ice melts tomorrow.

That's right, here in Texas if we get a drop of sleet or any sort of ice on the ground, we all stay in bed and watch the news until it gets sunny and melts away. Apparently we value our Hummers and assorted SUV's too much to drive in the ice or "snow."

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

Who knew going to an emergency room was so expensive? I guess when you sit anywhere for 6 hours untreated, you get a little less than what you pay for.
My most recent back escapade, after insurance, is costing me over $1500 just in emergency room fees. WTF, mate?

The only good news for all you aspiring doctors out there: This means that my back has now tipped the scales at being worth just over $10,000 in six month's time.

Apparently it's quite the rising stock.

I am so tired. I haven't gotten enough sleep the past few days and have way overdone it. Just a quick post and then I'm out. And dear sister, how much longer until you become a doctor or at least learn enough to get me freebies of my back drugs? Also -- um...thanks for inviting me to a party you are having in a week. Did you do that to offend me or just make me feel bad since I haven't been up there? Seriously. Although at first I thought it was actually going to be an evite coordinating everyone to be around for Arthur coming down to TX which would have been a really great way to irritate me.

M and I watched the My Boys premiere tonight on TBS. Which means I fell victim to one and/or both of the two marketing campaigns they had going (advertising minions -- that's not implying evil, as we determined this weekend, right? Right? -- rejoice!):

- M had My Boys condoms sitting out on the counter when I got home from the beach. Yes, condoms. Since I hadn't heard of My Boys and the condoms had stuff like "I just want to cuddle" and the TBS logo all over them (or as all over as something can be on a 2 inch square) , I thought My Boys was a new show about gay guys. Understandably. However, it's apparently a show about some chick that looks like Kate Hudson who has a bunch of guy friends and she's a sports writer. She's pretty but dating is just so hard. Oh, we haven't heard that one before!
Apparently some promo peeps were handing out said condoms downtown over the weekend when M and Shirikins went out. This must have been between them stealing the "If there's a fire, the exit looks this big!" poster for me. I had obsessed over this poster on my birthday when I saw it in a bar. Shirikins brought it all the way home for me and put it on my bed, but when I looked at it (sober and a few months later), I said "Why did I find this so hilarious again?" Shirikins said she didn't know but remembered that I had coveted it all night on my birthday.


- Jim Gaffigan, made famous for his stand-up routine surrounding Hot Pockets (I've put the link up before but if you didn't check it out then, you are doing yourself a huge disservice and your world must be very cold and lacking in laughter and comedy), is in My Boys. He plays the main girl's brother who is the older, married tied-down guy. Original, I know. Isn't it uncanny how the writers happened to put a character for everyone in there? Amazing. Anyway, I was watching Glenn Beck tonight while I was making dinner and Gaffigan was on promoting his show. His promo on Beck was rather unfunny but hey. Gaffigan's character did have a couple of funny lines during the episode tonight. His wife (yet to be introduced) is made out to be really cold and controlling. So Gaffigan goes over to his sister's place to escape and play poker with the boys one night a week. At poker night, someone asks Gaffigan's character, "Are you text messaging like the kids do these days?" Gaffigan goes, "Yeah, my wife figured out that she could text message me and I couldn't say 'I'm unable to talk right now,' like I would on the phone." A moment passes by and then Gaffigan looks up from his phone and asks, "What's 'ROTFL?'" His friend says, "Rolling on the floor laughing." Gaffigan immediately says, "Oh, I seriously doubt that."

I guess that's it. The show wasn't great, wasn't terrible. I was just glad there wasn't a laugh track. I also was surprised at how much TV I was able to tolerate tonight - I watched an hour of Sex and the City before My Boys. It just sucks to watch anything after that because it's so wonderful.

The most exciting news item was what I found out from all my determined TV watching (since as soon as I took a show, it left along with the rest of the US Army, thank you Project Runway and President Bush): Jim Gaffigan is going on tour in 07 and he's coming to the ATX. February 22 at the Paramount. Sweet!

I know homies, I have seriously neglected this blog lately. Or at least, I feel like I have. I've been running all over the place, between taking Shirikins to the airport this morning at 4 AM and spending an hour in the grocery store, I'm kinda tired.

But I thought I'd say hey and give a quick recap.

Le Beach was good times, despite whatever you Bostonians think about it. Imagine -- 80 degrees and sun. On Thanksgiving. I know. Even us Texans were a little surprised (I was prepared for a rainy, cool weekend staring at the ocean). While I never got in the water -- I had enough swimming in the ocean over Labor Day, thankyouverymuch -- the rest of the crew did. I thought I'd put some pictures up from Le Beach that I took.

Everyone seemed to like this picture of the gulls over head. They were hovering around all
weekend long -- like Fredericks (or Fredwicks or Franklins) are known to do. It didn't help that Man Shac was surreptitiously feeding them tortilla chips.

We had quite the time at the beach -- especially on Saturday when my Aunt noticed a ball bobbing on the waves. She bravely treaded out toward the ball and started dragging it toward the shore. We could tell from a distance that it was attached to something, but we lounged in our chairs until she dragged onto the shore a cage full of blue crabs! At that point, half of the population of the beach came over. Turns out it was a stray crab trap ("Dead or alive...Deadliest Catch!"). When she found it, a turtle was attached to the back, feeding on the crabs but by the time she got to shore it had swam away. One of the crabs was dead and there was the remainder of a shell (probably the turtle's breakfast) but we sent the other crabs that were alive off into the sea. It was most definitely their lucky day! I took a picture of the dead one, which must have barely made it. We left the trap on the beach (and it was mysteriously gone on Sunday apparently). I took a picture of it later in the day as the sun was setting, since it seemed poised so beautifully across the shore.



My favorite part of the Thanksgiving holiday was probably when I posed the question (among a crowd of seven): "Do you think the world is getting better or worse, yes or no?" Obviously, there are many different answers and many different ways to justify one's response. It was fun to debate with everyone since we were all of very differing opinions, in terms of what we consider making the world "better" or what we consider making the world "worse." I encourage anyone out there to approach this round-table discussion on a holiday when you're among people who love you so you can't piss them off too much. Just see what they say. It was also kind of nice because we had the "wild cards" which were my aunt and uncle's friends, who obviously could be pissed off because they don't know me at all -- but they weren't. I think we all enjoyed the discussion and it brought about some interesting viewpoints other than the ones that my mom and I argue back and forth regularly.



My mom, above left, and my aunt, above right, enjoying the beach. For them going to the beach is a sort of migration back into their childhood and years past when my cousins and sister and I were children. The go to the beach like one would go to a concert -- with an enthusiasm that has them walking on the beach picking up olive shells at 8:30 AM and not heading back to the house until the sun begins to dip behind the horizon. Both my mom and my aunt are talented artists, my aunt being a professor of art at a university and my mom working in design. So they spend their days staring at the sea and composing small portraits and landscapes. I admire their ability to let themselves drift into a sort of creative trance. While I can draw, I certainly am not drawn to it (pun intended) like my mom, aunt -- even my sister.



My uncle, top left, and cousin Man Shac, top right. My uncle is a consummate cattle rancher in South Texas who has been one of the few people in my artistically-motivated family that I have been able to have a discussion regarding protein percentages in different types of hay and grain, the pros and cons surrounding gooseneck trailers versus bumper pulls, and also the current hay and grain price hike due to gas prices and a terrible, once in a lifetime drought that is currently plaguing Texas and other southern states. Man Shac and I have always been close, as cousins go, however I have been able to enjoy much more of his company since he moved to Austin to go to UT. I can't tell you how many times I have been walking down 6th or 4th Street and suddenly spied Man Shac, only to start screaming across the street and have him completely not hear me -- leaving me to look like the crazy person I am.

On Saturday at dusk we headed over to the bird center where I got some pretty shots before the battery died on my camera. There were these disgusting water rats called "nutrias" (never heard of them -- google that and have a good shudder) swimming around and burrowing in reeds, juxtaposed by gorgeous, swan-like white pelicans that cruised through the water in a synchronized feeding frenzy. The weather was perfect and it was a great sunset -- despite the creep-factor of the nutrias, it was sublime.





My mom, cringing at the sight of a nutria, and some white pelicans moving through the water.

Our outing down to the coast was brief but very pleasant. The weather couldn't have been better -- the evenings were cool so that we sleep with the windows open, but the days were warm enough to swim.

When I returned on Sunday, my second Thanksgiving treat was that Shirikins had come home. Excitement abounds! After a brief concern that Chubby Charles had flown the coop (she really had just been trapped in M's room...again...but this time she didn't crap on the bed so that was a "phew!" moment for me), I was ready to meet up with Shirikins. She got a ride down to the Ranch so that she could spend the night with me and I could be the lucky soul who got to get up at 4 AM to drive her to the airport. Luckily I live about 15 minutes from the airport when there's no traffic, so I was back by about 4:45 and slept until 7:30.
We took our requisite "engagement photo" that we are prone to taking, on the infamous Green Chair this time (rather than in the bluebonnets). After discussing it, we decided Shirikins definitely looks like the wife since she's leaning into me as if I'm the protectorate, and I'm sort of hovering over her. It needs some cropping but we think it'll look great in the paper.
Then, we went down to Gingerman, a local beer bar on 4th and Guadalupe, to meet up with some other people who were in town or wanted to see Shirikins (I couldn't just keep her to myself). We met up with The Artist, looking rather svelte, and Paul the bartender that Shirikins collected many years ago. The Artist and Shirikins spent a few hours it seemed talking about the ways of boys...for once I had nothing at all to say. So I sat there and contemplated how quickly I could exit if there was a fire (my favorite bar activity). At 9:30 PM on a Sunday night, it would not have been hard.


Somehow their discussion of men led to the photo on the left above -- at this point my back was hurting from sitting so I was standing on the side by the table and Shirikins was sitting sideways after letting me out. I will leave it to you all to speculate as to what is going on in this. I really like the photo on the right -- Shirkins looking as though she's about to strangle someone and The Artist looking back in doubtful agreement.

It was great times, all in all. There's a hilarious event that also happened at the Amy's but I really don't have time to explain but just know it involved Shirikins and I spending 30 minutes hysterically laughing, trying to get a 50-year old photo booth to work, then having the employee come chunk quarters into it for another 20 minutes, with KT Tunstall blaring in the background the whole time. And yes: I got it on video.

Once I got over being sick and got over feeling sorry for myself, I felt like I had a lot to be thankful for this year. I got to see great family and friends. Despite my beliefs that the world is trending toward the worse, how lucky am I that I can lounge on a beach all weekend and then spend an evening having a couple of beers with friends? I just wish that we could all be so fortunate.

And now...sleep.

I'm sure you are all glad to see that Mean Rachel has recovered from her disease. It's been a rough few days but now at last my sinus pressure has subsided and I am now feeling much more healthy.

Man Chac has asked me to make a commentary on The Beach: Day II. So here goes.

After probably more than 18 hours of sleep yesterday, I woke up at 8 o'clock this morning to find the elders already feasting on breakfast, compromised of pumpkin and pecan pie topped off with whipped cream and washed down with coffee. They were basking in the early morning sunlight on the balcony and soon rallied the troops to head down to the beach.

The morning was cool and brisk, unlike the eighty-degree weather we're used to by 9 AM on any given summer morning. This allowed for everyone to sit out in the sun without being immediately baked to a crisp. Aunt Janny did a gouache painting while everyone else read and buried their toes in the moist morning sand.

We were all struck by the proliferation of dogs on the beach (this means all the more business for me!), from big fluffy retrievers flouncing along the shore, their tails matted with sand to the tiniest Yorkies trotting swiftly through the shallower water, their paws moving at a rapid pace in pursuit of their owners ahead of them.

By noon, everyone was ready for a turkey sandwich so we headed back up. I watched the rest of the UT game with Uncle George -- I suppose I should replace the word game with "heartbreaker," since UT lost to A&M by a touchdown. The sungoddesses (that would be mom and Aunt Janny) were ready to go back down to the beach for a swim and so I met them down there after they'd finished swimming.

Man Chac and I took a walk through Island Retreat -- for those who don't know, the Island Retreat is where we are currently staying and where we stayed every summer during our childhood years. My mother swore off ever going to the Island Retreat again after years of poor customer service followed by one "we'll laugh about it later" weekend when our air conditioner was broken (in the heat of July) and poured one gallon of water onto the brown shag carpet every hour due to some defect in the coolant system.

Call it fate or just my mother calling to book the trip too late, but we were forced to book here again for Thanksgiving. I kept commenting on how it looked so different from what my childhood memory retained -- the pool smaller, the boardwalk through the dunes seemed shorter. It turns out that in years past we had stayed in a different section of the Island Retreat, where the buildings faced the beach head-on, rather than the perpendicular one we are currently in, and the boardwalk that led to the beach scaled a larger dune than the one that leads from our building. And it turns out that this whole time, the Island Retreat had two pools -- I had just never walked around the other sides of the buildings to find the other one.

Everyone's older and times are very different. The boardwalks have been redone, the sidewalks repaved. New cabanas and picnic tables dot the common areas. Despite all this, the ocean is still there, wave upon wave of endless blue froth. And maybe that is why we come to the beach -- among a sea of change, the ocean will always remain the same.

At 9:45 AM my boss came in and said "Ready to get out of here?"

So I'm tying up some things and then I'm out. Off to get a new passport and make use of this afternoon.

I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving. To the boys in Iraq -- we're thinking about you. Be safe and take care of yourselves.

I am sick. Somehow I contracted via the phone whatever IS2 has. So that's nice.

Contracts abound at work which has kept me busy and is making this world spin around the sun even faster. Thank you.

Did anyone see that if you google the word "daecent" I am 3rd in the listing of search results?

I'm going to sleep for the rest of the night with one eye on MSNBC.
Goodnight all.

p.s. Goldie - I didn't answer your call because I am very tired and have no interest in watching Gilmore Girls.

I found this while trying to find one of the Colbert Report's "The Word" but I'm glad I accidentally stumbled across this -- made even funnier by the NaNoWriMo argument that Wax & 1/2 and I got into. I also like the Dan Brown jab.

It's only appropriate that after I posted my blog, I saw that the quote of the day is:

"You don't need a weather man to know which way the wind blows. Don't follow leaders watch the parkin' meters. - Bob Dylan"

My sister's favorite quote back in high school, second only to "We ride the waves and don't ask where they go," which she wrote all over her letters to her pen pals.

Yes, we were pen pal-ers.

And the irony flows over...

I'm so terribly embarrassed that I suck so much at life that I have failed everyone at NaBlo and NaNo this year. I will offer no excuses...just know that I do feel bad for neglecting both of these creative (failed) endeavors.

But -- as my boss is known to say -- "No matter what happens this week, it's only 2.5 days long."

That's right, my .5 and 1/2-loving friends, Wednesday is a half day at our office. Now all of you (and there are a few of you) who have been telling me about your Friday half days can be happy on Wednesday in knowing that I too will be leaving at noon.

Warning: Sister Rant Ahead.

My sister called me last night and we discussed our usual favorite topic: our parent's divorce. We like to discuss the different scenarios like whose house we should gather at on Christmas Day and the like. We are only spoiled in our complacency with having had married parents for the duration of our lives. So this is a big deal, especially to my sister I think because she is going to have to seek some sort of solace somewhere when she comes here and apparently Chez Chubby Charles isn't good enough.
Anyway. Last night here are some quotes from our conversations:
Goldie: "I won't be able to take two things about this divorce."
Rachel: "What's that?" (it was more like a mumbled "mmfph" to use "Baby-Sitter's Club-speak")
G: "One - if dad doesn't get his own health insurance..." She went on about the importance of health insurance for a while. To which I responded:
R: "mmfph."
G: "Two - if dad gets remarried and has a little girl and names it, like, Kaitlyn or Kylie or something. I just won't be able to take that."
R: "What if he had a boy and named it Benjamin?"
G: "I can't even think about that."
It was weird to think about the prospect of obtaining a 1/2 or .5 sibling, a development I hadn't even entertained prior to the conversation with my sister. Then, Goldie interrupted the silence with:
G: "I diagnosed someone with herpes today."
R: This time my "mmfph" was more of a "mmfph-ha!"
G: "Yeah it was really sad."
R: "Gross."
G: "Have you started watching Gilmore Girls like I told you to?"
R: "No. And I won't be any time soon. The last commercial I saw was showing the older chick in Paris getting engaged."
G: "It's really good."
R: "It doesn't matter I won't be watching it. Ever."
G: "The Rachel Ray show is really good too."
R: OUTRAGED - "WHAT?! I'm hanging up. Really, right now, I'm hanging up on you--"
G: "No! It's good, it's funny--"
R: "I don't care, there are many things that are offensive about that! One - you know I hate hate hate Rachel Ray and all things Food Network...Two - it implies that I would be at home at 3:30 in the afternoon and those of us who have jobs aren't exactly sitting around eating cookies watching Rachel Ray and Oprah after school still."
G: "It's funny! It comes on in the mornings here..."
R: "At what time?"
G: "Well, nine..."
R: "Okay, people start working at nine."

The conversation ended with my sister saying "The next time I call you, you better answer your phone, you never answer when I call." We had a dispute over this momentarily and then said goodbye.

Tonight I was getting some paper towels after work and my phone rang. Goldie. So I answered.

G: "Hey! Have you looked at all of _Our Childhood Friend Who Doesn't Read This Blog_'s pictures on Facebook?"
R: "I answered the phone for this?"

Well, I suppose there's not much more to say. I am headed off to the beach on Thursday morning. I'm hoping that I'm not getting sick. Nothing a "Port Aransas" (malibu rum & coke) can't fix.

So my dad took me on a date tonight to see Stranger Than Fiction, the new Emma Thompson, Will Farrell, Dennis Hoffman movie. After it was over, I imagined the blurb I would write if I was a reviewer: "Just what the doctor ordered!" Because blurbs always end in exclamation points! !

The movie was actually pretty decent daecent. Like...not horrible, actually maybe I would go so far as to say "good" in a "if I wasn't in a deep depression, can't get the energy to do anything but sleep" kind of mood. We originally had planned to go see Flags of Our Fathers, which my dad wanted to see, but my dad called me at work today and said "I think maybe it wouldn't be the best movie for you to go see right now." Apparently some sort of word has spread around the fam that I am not in a good way. His immediate suggestion for a replacement was, surprise, Borat. I told him that wouldn't be any better. Plus I am postponing my viewing of Borat until KillaPete and IS2 come back safely and then we will all have a good laugh and then have a long pause at the end of the movie where we realize it would have been way funnier in November of 2006 to have seen it. My dad offered Babel (which I know little about other than the short review I read on NYTimes.com and thought it sounded like Syriana: The Sequel only without Matt Damon but with equal amounts of confusing, poorly-drawn out plot lines.) or Stranger than Fiction and I chose the latter.

Will Farrell is one of those people who is hilarious even brushing his teeth. His face is so closely associated with comedy that people start chuckling even when he's trying to be serious. I thought he did a great job and didn't try to overact the humorous or the serious sides of his character, Howard Crick. He definitely gives Jim Carrey a run for his money in his ability to switch back and forth in emotions. Although Carrey is a bit of a one-trick pony in some of his movies -- I thought Farrell didn't "Spartanitize" (that's my reviewer word there) his character at all. Crick was an original, fresh hero who by the end of the movie you care about, which is hard to do when the entire premise is based on Thompson's character, novel writer Karen Eiffel, trying to write a book in which she "can't find a way to kill Harold Crick." The fact that they managed to turn Harold Crick into a real person -- and fully develop him in a creep-free way -- was surprising to me. Maggie Gyllenhaal, who I thoroughly enjoyed in Mona Lisa Smile, is a great counterpart to Crick in her role as his love interest, Ana Pascal. She's not too cutesy, not too harsh -- well-balanced and well-timed. Marc Forster is the same director that did Finding Neverland, which I went to at Shirikins' suggestion with little excitement and found myself bawling at the end of the film and demanding that everyone I know go see it.

If you want some light fare that will make you feel bad you're not doing a NaNo this year, I recommend you go see it.

Gotta go to sleep so I can drag myself out to jiu jitsu in the morning.

I don't know if it was the Sam Adams Octoberfest (or however they spell it) that I bought a single of at the HEB tonight after 1/2's suggestion, but I am feeling rather grim today.

I have hit the proverbial wall.
Do you want to know how hard I've hit that wall? I just wrote "I have hitten the proverbial wall." Hitten. Hitten? And the sad thing is -- it sounds right in my mind.

I don't like this at all. I picked up Life of Pi on Monday night and finished it last night. I'm voraciously digging through books and writing endless amounts of letters. And I still don't feel any better.

It is very easy to get into the habit of wake up, go to work, go home, sleep.

One actually somewhat amusing thing that happened this evening: someone Google searched "horses horses horses horses Meg Ryan" and my blog came in 4th on the Google listing.

Just amusing. Grimly amusing but it's a start.

I saw this on the Big Idea last night. Someone has already put it up on YouTube.
Apparently there is talk of Trump tossing around a run for President in 2008.
I can see the headlines it now:
"Bush, y'fired."

Hello interweb. I know I've pretty much given up the ghost on NaNoAnything this year. I probably should feel more ashamed than I am. Honestly, I didn't expect the deployment to be such a soul-sucking issue. I hardly have the desire to do anything but go to work and get every day over with as fast as humanly possible.

I will update you all on some interesting developments from the weekend and current week.

I went to Suzy's. Good times. My camera got mad at me and refused to work. IS2 celebrates again on his upgrade. Sooo...you have all been spared cute pictures of Suzy's baby warmbloods which are absolutely adorable. My horse readers take note: She's got a 6 month old Swedish Warmblood that is gorgeous. If you're looking for a good steal, let me know -- she'd be happy to sell him. He was just weaned.

I am not sure if it was stress or driving that caused my back to crap out on me yesterday, but crap out it did. I came home and didn't move from my bed from 3 PM onward. Despite the meds, I still had a restless sleep and was not a happy camper going to work today. My back hurt all morning. Medicine intake was as follows:
11 AM: Couldn't stand it any longer -- took 2 Lyrica's in hopes that it would kill the nerve pain. Usually the stuff works wonders almost instantly and takes me to a happy place. It didn't do anything.
12 PM: 500 mg of Ibuprofen. Thought it might be an inflammatory issue. It wasn't.
1:30 PM: 1 Vicoden. Did the trick -- relaxed my back long enough to get the pain to go down. It is still sore (especially on the left side) but better. I'm going to take one of my hardcore muscle relaxers tonight and see if it feels better in the morning.

Also - please note: It is not from jiu jitsu, as I have not been to jiu jitsu since last week. Thank you.

My aunt Janny had an opening on Thursday in San Antonio. I wish I could have gone. Maybe one day I'll manage to go to one. Until then, I loved the photos my mom sent to me...thought you all might enjoy them as well. Take a look! The elderly lady with the cane is my beloved Great Aunt Sylvia, to whom I owe all of my grammatical skills.

My new favorite friend, Matt B. , is hilarious. I am posting (without permission...) his Myspace blog regarding our election night debauchery last week. Ah...memories.

So i guess this week started off with a bang. I should back step a bit and mention the drunk blog. I will never drink and myspace again! Its too dangerous, I can not go into specifics, but in general i apparently made an ass out of myself. So that night I ended up hurting my ankle...and then blogging...ok so fast forward to Monday....Election Eve. My friend Will, emails me informing me that I havent voted yet. Little bastard....keep in mind i have voted in every major election for the last 8 years.....LORD! So anyway, I wake up early and head all the way to LBJ Highschool to vote for everyone running against a republican. So.....election night. I head over to the Stephen F. Austin Hotel where Will and Rachel are waiting on results for local democrats.

Upon my arrival i am thrusted into a game of "Paperclip" where you try and spot politcal celebrities and get a picture with them.... The best was meeting Mark Strama. We bumped into him after stalking Mayor Will Winn and some woman that looked like a prostitute. Well Mr. Strama asked if we wanted a picture with him and the mayor...and we said YES! Next thing I know he tells the prostitute (sorry if you are reading this and are not really a hoe) to take all of our pictures. It was a hoot! Almost more so than the dems winning the election!!!

Matt cracks me up. "PAPERCLIP!"

IS2 got an APO. I spent a good part of the day trying to figure out what online stores ship household wares to APOs. It took a few google searches but I got it. There's actually some website that listed all the major big box stores that would ship sheets and bedding to APOs. Isn't the web lovely?

I suppose lastly I will tell you about the adventure my dad and I had this evening after work. I made a return to the barn. Yep. We had to go get the Coke and candy machines that my dad had so kindly loaned to MRS. It was a huge burden on my shoulders because I remember when he dropped them off and how William Watkins (ahhh William...I know, M@, the good old days...) had to help him. And William, who Bay & I always called "our broad-chested man" was pretty strong. So needless to say I wasn't sure how much help I would be as the gimpy assistant to my elderly dad. My only hope was that I'd be able to recruit whatever remaining grooms were around the barn.

It was somewhat fortunate that we went on a Monday (although unplanned). Monday is the day of rest at the barn, sort of like any other service where people come out on the weekends so they close on Monday. Aside from wondering how we would possibly get the machines moved out I was also concerned about running into...anyone.

As my dad and I drove up (and as my dad was teetering on the edge of a breakdown, because I'm sure he too realized the grave situation of us trying to move the games) I first saw Chuy's Suburban, proudly displaying his yellow ribbon, which he had bought "para el Capitan." Chuy supports the troops. And then -- like an image of God himself on the horizon -- there was Chuy walking right across our path, exactly the way I left him: his potbelly draped with his token denim snap shirt.

Chuy cruised over to the truck immediately, saying his hello's and shaking my hand and mi padre's. We then backed the Ram up to the haybarn and Gerardo appeared with a flashlight (the lights were out -- some kind of wiring problem) to guide us in moving the machines.

Thank God, hallelujah, that they were there to help. With the three of them and me operating the lift gate, it was barely possible to load all of the games. It was great to see Chuy again -- I miss the old guy, what can I say.

I was also more than delighted that I did not have to run into one single person who spoke english! It was perfecto.

That's all she wrote.

Old M@ sent this to me -- usually I don't find these videos he sends interesting enough to post on here, but this one is pretty fantastic. Makes our Diet Coke & Mentos experiment look pretty sad. Thanks M@! And you know I'm just kidding you about your videos...keep 'em coming! "The guys from EepyBird are back, with 251 bottles of Diet Coke and over 1,500 Mentos mints. In Experiment #137, they did a mint-powered version of the Bellagio fountains. This time, it's one giant Coke & Mentos chain reaction that has to be seen to be believed." Keywords: diet coke mentos experiment

Dear TxDOT Officials:

When you finally decide to open the toll roads, after 5+ years of working on them, perhaps you could give your Texas drivers a little warning so that they will actually have money for the said toll roads.

Kind regards,

Mean Rachel

Oh, what a night.
Early November on Election Day.
When I heard the TV announcer say,
Democrats controlled the House that night.

Oh, what a night.
You know, I can't spell Pelosi's name,
But Congress is never gonna be the same.
What an election. What a night.

Oh, Don. Don I'm sorry you had to resign
From the staff but I,
I will never forgive you for this gaff.

Oh, what a night,
Got Virginia, Got Missouri.
It was everything I dreamed it'd be.
Don's surrender, what a night!

I felt a rush like a Republican on a plunder
Spinnin' Dubya around and taking Donny under!
Oh, what a night!

Oh, Don. Don I'm sorry you had to resign
From the staff but I,
I will never forgive you for this gaff.

Oh, what a night.
Why'd it take so long to see the light?
Seemed so hard, but now it seems so right.
What a election, what a night!

I felt a rush like a Republican on a plunder
Spinnin' Dubya around and taking Donny under!
Oh, what a night!

I remember being a young child, sitting on our old couch in our old home in central Austin, watching on TV with rapt attention as the results came in for the first presidential election that I was even remotely aware of. My mom was on my left and my dad was in the kitchen as the voice of the late Peter Jennings washed over the living room, a smooth running commentary as Bill Clinton was announced as the new President-elect. A blizzard of confetti appeared on screen, showering a roaring coliseum of jubilant Clinton supporters, as our new president, along with Hilary and Chelsea, stood on a vast stage amongst a pile of red, white and blue balloons that appeared to bounce and skip about their ankles like happy terriers. Over the clapping and cheers, across the loudspeaker came a steady beat and then Fleetwood Mac's "Don’t Stop Thinking About Tomorrow" was playing across the stadium, across my living room, across the country and into history.

This moment was surreal to me -- I knew the faces and names but I didn't know the implications. I didn't know the policies or what NATO was or what "The buck stops here" really meant. What I did intuit was the joy that the television displayed, the regal tone of Jennings as he announced a winner that he seemed proud of, the electric air in my household that night which felt like Christmas morning just before the biggest present is opened. I fed off this energy and felt a part of the Clinton victory -- I felt proud and honorable and for the first time, I felt what it meant to be American.

Since I have been a voter, I have never felt proud. My first experience on the brink of voting was the infamous Bush-Gore race in 2000, when I was a senior in high school. I happened to be taking Government and we spent the weeks before the election discussing what this election meant to the United States and the world. We watched The War Room and I was swept up again with emotion for the Clinton campaign -- I momentarily forgot about Monica and Watergate and the embarrassment I had felt as a teenager growing up during a political sex scandal. I felt older and mature enough then to understand what a feat the Clinton administration had accomplished and maintained. My situation in life at the time -- my desire to follow a passion and my dreams -- made me identify with the famous James Carville quote from The War Room:

"There's a simple doctrine. Outside of a person's love the most sacred thing they can give is their labor. Labor is a very precious thing you have and any time you can combine labor and love...you've really made a match."

I felt loved by the administration. Clinton's discrepancies on the side were moments that I wanted to turn away from -- like when you see someone trip and you try to pretend you didn’t notice in order not to embarrass them. The shame I had once felt was a small price to pay for the benefits I had received as an American. Clinton took care of me and created a world in which I felt safe. I mailed him a tape when I was nine during the Winter Olympics of me singing a song and he'd sent me back a letter with a glossy eight-by-ten photo of himself. I watched Chelsea grow up as I grew. Hilary wrote books and spoke out on behalf of women. The world was a happy one for me and I appreciated the labor of love the Clinton administration had put forth.

We were sent home from school in 2000 with little black and white maps of the United States. Our homework for the night was to watch the election results and color in the red states and then color in the blue states. Being that I was only sixteen my senior year, I could not participate in the mock voting that they had set up prior to the election. However, I felt that even though I was unable to vote, I had something at stake. It was the Clinton legacy and some part of that, I felt, was my legacy as an American.

When I arrived at Government the next morning at 8:00 AM, everyone looked tired. We had all stayed up late into the night, coloring the states. All of our maps looked the same -- divided and messy. Our Florida states were colored blue, then red, then blue, then red again. We'd given up. It was a momentous experience, watching the election coverage that morning in a country divided and in a classroom divided.

I voted in the mid-term elections in 2002. My first time to vote was for a candidate whom I had little excitement for, running against our default governor Rick Perry after he took over when Bush was elected in 2000. For as involved as I had been during the 2000 election, I had no interest now that I could finally vote. In 2004, I was inspired by an intelligent alternative in the Kerry-Edwards team. Their run for presidency got me out volunteering with the Lake Travis Democrats in the months leading up to the election.

After every election, since 2000, I have felt let down. Disappointment is one thing, but the feeling of being let down has been worse. The legacy, my legacy as an American -- my government for the people, by the people, of the people -- has failed.

"Don't stop thinking about tomorrow…" There is something about time that I am beginning to understand. It's not a great aspect nor is it bad, but it is a lesson. Time passes. I am still learning that. Time will pass whether we sit and do nothing or whether we fight with every part of our being. Time will pass whether people are unhappy or celebrating. You cannot stop thinking about tomorrow, because it soon will be here, "better than before."

Last night I was inspired. I attended the True Blue Travis County Democrats party at the Stephen F. Austin downtown on 7th and Congress. I met up with my mom, ever the cynic, and my cousin Will and my new favorite person Matt B. We watched as the results rolled in, standing shoulder-to-shoulder with local and state candidates. We milled about the crowd, feeling the buzz and the energy. Several of the candidates gave speeches early in the night -- the shoe-in's like Congressman Lloyd Doggett and Senator Kirk Watson. I was empowered listening to them talk. Change was in the air.

At around 10:30 PM, we had decided to walk out of the main ballroom and into the other room. As we headed for the big open doorway, we suddenly heard the crowd erupt in cheers. I turned around to see the giant screen that had CNN on showing "Democrats Win Control of the House." We started cheering -- no, screaming -- at the screen. Minutes later, Virginia democrat Webb pulled into the lead for the Senate race. People were teary-eyed and hugging, shaking their fists in the air, taking pictures with their camera phones, standing on chairs whistling. Politicians were hugging constituents, kissing babies for the simple fact that they were there, not because of a camera flashing. Strangers smiled at strangers, eyes glinting with happiness. It was Christmas morning and we were about to open the greatest present of all.

In a moment I was transformed from a beaten-down D living in a GOP state to an exhilarated voter, part of the change. Here I was fourteen years later and I could hear the Fleetwood Mac and feel the confetti in my hair and see the balloons bouncing at my feet. Last night, I was reminded that with time brings change. And perhaps the theme, the mantra to not stop thinking about tomorrow, has never rung more loud and clear:

Yesterday's gone, yesterday's gone.

Sometimes my job is really funny. Because we deal with people all over the world, the emails I get can be hilarious -- the artistic license people often take with the english language and the colloquialisms that sometimes slip out are great.
One of my favorite parts is seeing how Outlook translates the "Out of Office Reply" on people's emails. For example:
In Venezuela, the emails come in as: fuera de la oficina / Out of Office
In Switzerland, the emails come in as: Abwesenheitsnotiz
Bless you.
Another funny one was what I got today from my agent in Copenhagen. I had asked her to find out some information about import requirements and she wrote back an entire email in great english and then at the bottom said "As for the import requirements, I will tjeck on that."
So all of today we've been trying to see who can write the best sentences with words that have the replaced "ch" in them…we got "what a tjampion" and "don’t be tjeesy." Someone else wrote "I'm always messing up words like tjeck and suttj."

On another work-related note, a few weeks ago PetRelo got signed up for AllExperts. It's basically a free site where people ask questions and you answer them for free, for whatever motive you have (in our case, exposure and name-branding). Guess who gets to answer the questions. That's right. I love this job.
I got my first question today. I'll post it in case any of you are traveling from Germany into the US with a dog in the near future.

Questioner: Shannon
Category: Travel with Pets
Private: no

Subject: travel from europe to states with pet
Question: Hello!
I'm traveling from Germany to Illinois with a Cocker spaniel. I just got his health
certificate, but found out he was behind on his rabies shot. They gave him an
update, but is it too soon to fly? We leave in 2 days. Thanks
Shannon

Answer: Hi Shannon,

That's a great question. Thanks for stopping by to ask us.

Coming from Germany into the US, you will need a health certificate dated within 10 days of the flight and a rabies certificate that is older than 30 days but less than 1 year (it can be up to 3 years if the rabies shot is a 3 year vaccination).

In your case, you will not have time to fulfill the requirement for the rabies shot. That doesn't mean that your dog can't come with you to the US, though. According to the Center for Disease Control (CDC), if you bring a dog into the US that is not vaccinated for rabies, you will need to fill out a "confinement agreement" and show that document (if asked) at the port of entry. For more information on this, go to the CDC page regarding importing pets: http://www.cdc.gov/ncidod/dq/animal.htm
Then, scroll down to the "Dogs" section. You will see the confinement agreement listed in that section as an Adobe file that you can download and fill out ahead of time.

The confinement agreement basically says that upon your arrival in the US, you will keep your dog confined in-home -- don't worry, you are not agreeing to send him into quarantine. You will be able to clear through customs with your pup and take him home with you, just please make sure you keep him away from other animals until the 30 days is up.

As a side note, I also recommend that you contact the airline that you are flying on and double check that they do not have an airline-enforced policy regarding rabies shots. Most airlines just require the health certificates.

I hope this helps answer your question! Let me know if you need any more information.

Happy traveling and wagging tails!

Rachel Farris
PetRelocation.com
rachel@petrelocation.com



My goal is to become the Expert of the Month. The highest honor.
Oh speaking of which -- we know where we're going on our company trip. Playa del Carmen! Que rico. I can't wait. I think we are going to go at the end of January. The best part of the deal is that they are paying for our significant others to come along! Since IS2 is occupied, I am trying to conivince the wife, Shirikins, to meet me en la playa. Can't wait. This will give me something to look forward to over the next few months. And then it will be March/April before I know it and I'll get to see IS2.

However, my immediate goal for tonight is to get some sleep. This weekend took it out on me.

Did anyone else catch the Family Guy last night? It was a hilarious episode about the Army ("Saving Private Bryan") -- my favorite line was when the Sgt. Angryman said "Good job men, remember that when you leave for Iraq tomorrow" and Bryan the dog goes "Did he just say Iraq?" and Stewie says "Oh, no, no, certainly not, I'm sure he meant Fraggl-iraq."
Actually, the whole thing was hilarious. The Army recruitment scene that showed the guy running around with a bunch of girls in bikinis, diving into a pool of money with them, with "Pour Some Sugar On Me" playing in the background; the part where Bryan and Stewie are trying to get honorable discharges by shooting each other in the foot ("We don't give honorable discharges to people who get shot anymore."); and the part where the news reports after everyone is sent home ("Democracy has been achieved!") and it says "Only a great mastermind could make this happen," and it cuts to Dubya standing at the top of a staircase trying to get a slinky to go down (unsuccessfuly), over and over again. It finally starts going down the stairs and Dubya starts screaming "Laura! LAURA! Come quick!!"

Speaking of which…I found this last week and thought my guests might like it:

My Iraqi Leadership Name is Rashid Tilfah al-Tikriti.
What's yours?
Powered by Rum and Monkey.

Oh. And…um…Nano, anyone? Yeah. Really, really behind. Like 5 days behind. I'm not sure I'll rally.
And that's it. Another Monday down.

Got this email from my cousin's friend Matt, whom we went block walking with a few weekends ago. Yes, another Matt. Luckily this one is a Matt B.
Imagine this in Heidi Klum-speak.

Little over 24 hours left.......THIS IS OUR HARDEST CHAWENGE EVA!!!!

Will the Democrats...be in....or out (auf)

Republicans: You led an amazing campaign against terror and conquested (Heidi-ism) the nations of Afghanistan and Iraq....unfortunatley you were hasty in your planning and have fallen short when it comes to execution, and staying in budget....

Democrats: You had an amazing race, but you let John Kerry tarnish your trade mark......and the American people are not exaclty sure if you can do better than the Republicans.....

WHO WILL WIN OLYMPUS FASHION WEEK.....err the elections....

Say "auf wiedersehen" to Perry! This is your friendly Monday reminder that tomorrow you have got to vote!

I managed to do absolutely nothing today. Seriously. I was all thrown off from last night and then waking up to take the girls downtown, then trying to go back to sleep was unsuccessful, my entire body still hurts from jiu jitsu...today was an effort.
I'm glad I didn't try to go to another class today -- I had thought about it because I won't be here this weekend, but I physically wouldn't have been able to do it. I showed M the holes on my feet that you get from the mats and the burns on my knees and she's like "It's like you're riding horses again!" Yes. However I could ride six horses and not be anywhere near as sore as I am right now. Okay yes, that's probably because I've been riding since I was five, but still.
Although Anne had told me that if I couldn't make the evening classes right on time, it would be okay if I showed up a little late. "This isn't the Karate Kid," she said. That made me laugh. You know what's really funny? When someone's totally understated and quiet and they suddenly spit something out like that. It's so unexpected and seemingly out of character. So if the burns on my knees go down a little bit I might go this week after work some time. I will have to start taping my feet up though, those aren't going to go away.
The only thing I did today was go to Central Market and get some provisions. I got some fruit, some crackers, some tortilla chips, and some apple cider. It may be 60 degrees here but I can pretend like it's fall, right?
Actually, today was rather fall-like. It was overcast and misty (like yesterday) and stayed cooler than yesterday so it wasn't nearly as humid. I found it calming. When 8 AM looks like 12 PM and 12 PM looks like 4 PM, there's really no need to go outside and live it up.
It makes me miss IS2 though. I was discussing this peculiarity with Emily, one of the girls I went out with last night. It's not a big deal to get up, go to work, come home, go to sleep. Anyone can do that for 365 days and be fine. But there are definitely passages of time that you start to notice, despite your best effort not to. The day after IS2 left, it finally started getting cool out. The season changing is eerie, it tells you things are different even though you want to fool yourself that everything is still the same. Your denial cannot work its way into your subconscious like the weather can, the way a cloudy day can make you feel sad for no reason or the sun being out make you feel happy despite whatever may be going on around you. I guess that's just part of being human, part of anyone's basic instinctual reaction to the world around them; a human reaction to something that was once there is now suddenly gone.

Enough. Really. JHann, I forgot to mention that Emily knows Jennifer Beall. I know! Ha! Small, crazy world. First scrapbooking reference, now this. Evidently they were in a sorority together at Duke. It was somewhat funny because I saw on Emily's wall that Jennifer had posted "Hi sister" or something like that. I did a double take and suddenly was gripped with fear that they actually might be related (because I really like Emily). Then she told me they were sorority sisters. Oh, right. That kind of sister. Why did I think Jennifer (I'm not using the alias for her that you and I use because, seriously, you never know who reads this stuff) went to some school in California? Well...whatever. You'll have to tell me your thoughts on that development. But it did make me chuckle when I remembered the time that she approached me on the last day of HS when I was trying to get everything signed by my teachers and having a panic attack because Abusabi wouldn't sign my document saying I went to her class and passed it because she didn't believe me that I was a senior. I remember how Jennifer came up to me in the AP office and was like "Oh, Rachel, I never got your contact information for the Senior Directory," or whatever book that was that they handed out at graduation. I was in such a terrible mood that I turned around and snapped at her: "I know -- I did that on purpose. I don't know anyone I'm graduating with and don't really care if they want to get in touch with me." She looked horrified. So I felt instantly bad and said, "Fine, but really, no one knows me..." And I never even got that damn directory. Perhaps that was because I never went to graduation either. Ah, Westlake. A strange three years.
Speaking of sisters, the non-sorority kind, my own personal blood-sister Grace (who goes by Goldie on here for whatever reason) asked me to post the link to her coup de Grace comic strip archive. She did this for the Brown Daily Herald during her first couple of years or so of college (how many, Goldie? I can't keep up with this minutia). I guess she wants to get some more traffic, despite the fact that these comics are like, five years old now. And Goldie is still there. Almost a doctor. But not quite. But a damn good comic stripper (ahhahahahah that's great stuff, comedy gold there).
Goldie, I actually went and looked at them...and where is the one that you did on my birthday about the similarities that Sadaam and I have in common? That was your best one, in my always humble opinion. Get your archive lackey to post that one.
Also--how funny is ER now that Uncle Jessie is on it? I watched it for the first time in a year or more the other night and I was like "Uncle Jessie?" What? The best part is that he basically plays Uncle Jessie. The only difference is he wears scrubs and lives with some woman...I can't figure out what's going on there, I think his friend died and he was married to the lady he lives with and now they're together. Or something. Who knows.

Subtitled: ...Never The Bride Who's Angry

Ding dong, the wedding's over - fa la la la la, yay yay yay!
I am so, so, so very tired. I was up yesterday for a total of 17 hours. Most of that time was spent either on the ground sparring (12-3), taking a shower & getting ready (3-5), standing and filming a wedding (5-10) and then downtown with some 1st Cavalry ladies (11-3 AM).
Oh yes. It was quite the full day.
I will start where I left off and see how far I get. I really don't feel like doing much else other than sit here on my bed, so hopefully this will entertain me for a while.
Jiu jitsu yesterday was really fun. I had a substitute named Mike and the assistant was this lady named Anne. Anne is probably right around 5'2" or 5'3" and weighs no more than 100 lbs. After we stretched, Mike had us start off practicing inside control moves. Inside control is where you have a grip inside of their ams -- whether it be your hands gripping their wrists from the inside, or one of your hands "goosenecked" around their neck on the inside of one arm and the other hand gripping their wrist, pulling down, or both hands in "monkey paw" behind their neck (where you cup your hands together with your fingers all together so they don't get broken and apply pressure on their neck by bringing your wrists toward you, pushing their head down). He had us line up in two lines, and one line rotated every few minutes to give us a new partner to practice with. I liked this! I started off with Anne, who was so tiny that I was afraid I was going to break her. Then I got this guy named Lee who was twice her size and I had no qualms about wraslin' with him. We kept rotating through the partners and it was interesting to learn different tricks from each of them. Each one had his own style; one guy just wanted to do inside control with our wrists where it's almost like "hand pile" where you just keep going and going, trying to strengthen your wrists. Today mine are really chaffed from it.
Then we learned takedowns from inside control. Let me see if I can describe the technique. You have one hand goosenecked around their neck. Then you take your other arm and put it under their armpit and grab their shoulder. Then you push your forehead into the opponent's collar bone, basically to distract them and make them think about it for a little bit. Then you start pushing them backwards, and you rotate your shoulders with a lot of strength and it basically throws them off balance and they fall back. From there, you fall with them, clear their legs so they don't get you in their lock, and take side control (where you're laying with your body across theirs, perpendicular, and you have your knee in one hip and your other knee in their shoulder, then your elbows in their opposite shoulder and hip, preventing them from squirming out.).
Another takedown we learned was from inside control of their wrists. You basically throw their arms away, put one foot out in front of you, between their two legs, and kneel onto one knee, keeping the other leg out behind you for base (kind of like a monster walk or a lunge but you go all the way down onto the knee you are stepping forward on). Then, and this is tricky, you swing your leg that's out behind you, forward behind theirs. While you push your shoulders and head into their hip, you take your hands and chop at their knee, and basically use your gravity as leverage to bring them down. Once I got the hang of stepping forward, going down to my knee, and then keeping the balance while you swing your leg out in front of you, I liked this move a lot. So far, this class has really been helping me with the tightness in my hips because so much of it requires you to rotate your leg within your hip socket.
Mike then showed us the spinning arm bar, which was tricky. It was also made harder by the fact that I was practicing with Anne and I was worried I was going to crush her because you have to lean against their stomach and jump across them. She kept telling me to put my weight on her but she seemed so tiny.
We drilled in pairs on our techniques for a while and then we had a little break and everyone started sparring. I was a little nervous because I hadn't done that with Bosco, he had been more of a dummy for me to practice on. So I was stretching and one of the guys Mike came over, who was like 6' but not too heavy and asked me if I wanted to spar. I told him I hadn't done it before and he was like "That's okay, just work the stuff in you learned today."
So we started sparring and I took him down! I got him by doing the monkeypaw behind his neck and pulling him down and forward. Then I had side control and we were trying to do our moves, and at some point I had the option for the choke, which I had learned last week and is pretty basic. But, he blocked with his arm, so I grabbed it and got it in a key lock and he tapped out! I was pumped after this. Then we went again and he took me down this time. I defended for a while and actually got him off me and kicked him away and then did my jump up that I'd had trouble with last week but had practiced a little bit. Once I was standing up again, I took him down again and got him in side control with him on his stomach. This was a very good opportunity for me to do a modified-guillotine and he tapped out again. Jordan, one of the other trainers, came over and showed me a move that I could do that was even more forceful than that where you jump to their other side while you have them in the choke and lean back making your choke much more fierce.
Then I sparred with Anne for a little while. The pace was a little bit slower although we did do a lot of grappling and she would shrimp around away from me. She helped me with my shrimping, and it was much better than last week. I think it was hard to get around Bosco because he doesn't make a lot of room for me to get away.
I was wiped out after class but of course no rest for the weary and I came home and had to hot foot it into the shower to get ready for the wedding. Yay, weddings! I arrived at the church at 5 PM and started setting everything up and getting some shots. I was filming the guests as they were ushered in and through my lensfinder I suddenly saw someone and said to myself, "Is that Rusty?"
Yep. What makes a wedding even worse? Seeing your old boss and his wife.
Well, the wedding started, albeit about forty-five minutes late, and everything went amazingly smoothly. The best part was that because I was so focused on not messing up, I had no time to get emotional. It was a good way to be detached, staring through a little 3" by 5" screen and being paralyzed with fear that I was going to mess up.
During the part where the bride and groom walk out, followed by the bridal party (the photographer, earlier in the day when I described that part to him as that looked at me and said, "You mean the recession?"), the "low tape" started flashing and I had five minutes left on my tape! But luckily I got the very last grandma being escorted out and the tape cut off. Perfect timing, couldn't have asked for it any better. The photographer and I even had a little classic part like in a movie where I finally gained his respect. He came up behind me during the vows to take a shot and looked through the viewfinder and saw how I had it framed and nodded at me quietly and smiled. A small victory there.
I hauled over to the reception, where I spent another 45 minutes waiting for it to start. I had to get them coming in as they were announced. Originally they were going to come in up these back steps but because it was misty the coordinaters wanted them to come up through the inside stairs for their announcement. So there was a little bit of time where I didn't know where I was supposed to be but then they talked to Cheryl and Craig when they finally got there and agreed to go up the inside stairs. So I hustled up and got ready to shoot. I had a really good spot where they would walk through right next to the ice sculpture (yes, ice sculpture) with their names on it. It was a good spot. The photographer's assistant was like "I thought you were a professional because of where you were standing and how you were framing everything." She was really nice, she looked like a short Angie Harmon. Anyway, they are going to put the photos online so I'll post then link when they come up.
After the toasts and the dancing and me saying awkward hello's to Rusty and his wife, I left. My duties were done. I never got emotional, thanks to living through the camera rather than letting reality hit me.
I went home, changed out of my wedding clothes and went down to meet some girls at the Ivory Cat piano bar. Andrea is the wife of one of IS2's friends, Richard. When IS2 got back from Iraq the last time, he lived on Andrea and Richard's couch. Andrea spent all of last night telling me how she has such a soft spot for him because of this and how when she watched my video she started crying about IS2 leaving. She kept saying "Who makes a video like that?" Andrea brought with her Emily and Christine, and then two other women who left really early (as Andrea said "When I look at you Rachel, I see a survivor, but I worry about them."). Emily is from North Cackalacky (IS2: She asked me how I knew this when I said, "Ah North Cackalacky!" after she told me she was from Raleigh). She met her husband at Duke. Christine is from Colorado. They were all really fun. I was the DD, so I had a completely sober night (I don't think I would have made it that late had I been drinking) and drove us all home at 3 in the morning after Andrea standing on 6th Street for an hour saying "I don't want this night to end!" We got home and they all slept in my living room on the floor (amazing, I don't know how they did it) and the couch, and then we got up at 7 and I drove them back to their car (Andrea had to get back by 9). Oh! Shirikins, you will love this. So, we were trying to get to 8th and San Jacinto. I was on 5th Street and it was blocked off at Lamar. I was like "Since when do they block off 5th Street?" Christine said "It looks like there's some kind of race..." and I suddenly saw ALL THESE JOGGERS all over the place. Race for the Cure.
We COULD NOT get past Guadalupe. We finally pulled over and asked a cop and he said they'd have to get out and walk. I felt so bad. I dropped them off at 8th and Guadalupe and they had to do the walk of shame all the way to San Jacinto at 7 AM. "Honk if you hate joggers!"
Hopefully they aren't still walking. We had fun anyway. I'm going to put up some pics from last night. I like how in the last 2 photos everyone has their hand on their head!!!

So I am writing this entry outside the Borders in Westgate, prior to attending my jiu jitsu class from 12-3 pm today. I came down here to work on my NaNo and have a cup of decaf joe, but it’s already 11:20 and I don’t think that will allow me enough time to get going properly. I know…procrastination comes in sneaky forms, doesn’t it?

A word to the wise: If you are ever asked to “come” to a wedding with the caveat that you will be the one and only videographer for said wedding, just say no! Today is Day 2 of my punishment for not having a spine and agreeing to go be a “worker bee” at someone’s wedding that I hardly know.

I was already having second thoughts, but last night at the rehearsal, my unwillingness to do this videotaping was driven home by…well, just attending the rehearsal! I arrived at 6:00 PM at the Mt. Olive Church, a small Lutheran church set on a hill just south west of where I live (one redeeming fact: the wedding & reception are all being held within 15 minutes of my residence. Score.). I thought they had told me that it started at 6:30 PM and that everyone would be getting there at six, so I went straight from work. When I arrived, there were only 4 cars in the parking lot, belonging to the MOPS, or “Moms Of Pre-Schoolers” that were doing their monthly fundraising event, “Scrapbooking!!!”(!!!!1!11!!!omgLOL) One of the MOPS asked me happily when I arrived “Are you here for the scrapbooking?” This was funny for two reasons: 1) Just the thought that I might actually be there for the scrapbooking event, and 2) That I looked like a MOP. Um…?

I digress…I told her no, I was there for the rehearsal and she showed me into the (empty) church. We couldn’t find the lights so I just sat in a back pew and breathed deep until I heard the door open behind me. “Hi!” I exclaimed, as I turned to see an elderly woman, who didn’t even see me and no doubt thought she was hearing the voice of Mary Magdalene coming from within the depths of the darkened church hall, and watched as she jumped probably higher than she had in about 20 years.

After she calmed down, she explained that she was the representative of the church, there to do all the lighting stuff and other various things that you get I suppose when you lay 5 grand down on a church hall for a wedding.

Thirty minutes later, Cheryl the bride and some others arrived. By about 7 o’clock (in case you can’t keep track, I’ve now been there for an hour), everyone and everything (topiaries, unity candles, practice bouquets, my video camera and tripod...) was there.

Also in attendance was Bruce, the photographer. He walked over to me and made a comment on my tripod and I suddenly realized that he thought I was a professional, just kickin’ it in the pews. I tried to tell him I was an amateur family friend, but he didn’t hear me. He asked me if I would like to go walking around with him to “plan our shots” (there’s planning to this?) and so we went climbing up in the church’s loft whereupon we found the unfinished, refurbished organ that he spent twenty minutes commenting on. During this time, I was close enough to him in this little loft that I suddenly was able to smell him and diagnose him as hammered. Booze was exuding through his pores – he smelled like Wild Turkey (takes one to know one). I found this histerical and spent the rest of the evening trying not to get in his way while he was taking his shots.

So. Here we go, the rehearsal begins. I quickly realize that I will need to have two spots set up. I need to be almost head on at the front of the church by the altar to get everyone walking down the aisle. So I stood a bit to the side of the altar, far enough back so that I wasn’t in the way of the 5 bridesmaids lining up. From there, once Cheryl and Craig began their vows, I had to hotfoot it down to the other end of the church and shoot from the side for their vows and then get them coming head-on as they walk down the aisle as a married couple.

I quickly realize that there is a huge problem during run through #2, the final run through. I was standing just behind and to the left of the altar, shooting as the bridesmaids and groomsmen come down the aisle. This worked perfectly until the matron of honor was led up. When she stood right at the final place next the altar, she blocked my entire shot down the aisle. So I couldn’t get the little flower girl and ring bearer and then certainly couldn’t get the single most important part of any bride’s walk down the aisle: the walk down the aisle.

I tried all sorts of angles but if I moved any further behind the altar, my shot was then blocked by a topiary and the unity candle. I tried shooting over the shoulders of the bridesmaids but it wasn’t working. So, I filmed the rest of the second run through and then stood at the back of the church trying to figure out how to remedy this.

Ryan, Cindy’s son and Cheryl’s brother, came over and was asking me how it turned out. I explained the problem and rolled the tape so he could see how the matron of honor was pretty much botching my shot. “So Debbie needs to move over…” Ryan said. Debbie, the matron of honor, is Cindy’s sister and Cheryl’s aunt. She had kind of a sour look on her face the entire time (is this a quality of people named Debbie?) which is precisely why I hadn’t tried, during the run through, tapping her on the shoulder and making her move over. She was out to kill.

Ryan, the ultimate gentleman, went and approached his parents about this problem for me. This was at the point where everyone was getting the last minute advice from the pastor (I couldn't hear what exactly they were discussing but my imagination conjured up something like, "TURN BACK NOW!") and getting ready to go to the dinner. Cindy came over and saw the tape, realized the problem, and gathered the bridesmaids to tape off where they need to stand.

Debbie looked extremely pissed about this. We told her she needed to move over to her right and she moved about two inches. Still I could not get any shots of the aisle. I approached the harem.

“What if we had Hannah (the flower girl) stand where you’re standing and you stand to your right next to all the bridesmaids?” I said with trepidation.

Debbie looked at me like I had said “We all know this wedding’s never going to work out, come on, let’s just go to Luby’s and get some good meat & potatoes.”

“It’s customary,” she said, through gritted teeth, “for the flower girl to stand between the matron of honor and the bridesmaids.”

I wanted to say “Is it customary for the matron of honor to be a bitch?” but I didn’t. Because really, when it came right down to it, it’s not my damn wedding and I have absolutely nothing invested in it. If they wanted to stare at Debbie’s back during “Here comes the bride” then that would really be fine by me at the end of the day.

Cindy interjected, seeing my expression. “I think Hannah can stand to your left just during the part where Cheryl comes down the aisle and then you’ll switch back.” Debbie looked pissed about this but Cindy’s was the last word. They taped off their spots and everyone got ready to leave for the dinner.

It was awful. And I have a sneaking suspicion that tonight Debbie will not comply. But I won’t panic. I tried to make it work…if she wants to sabotage me, then so be it. I’ll tell Cheryl that when she has little daughters and they want to watch the wedding tape, during the part where she comes down the aisle with her father, to tell the kids, "Use your imagination. This was the early 2000's...people couldn't levitate."

When I told IS2 (who is still in Kuwait for a few more days) about this on the phone last night, he said “So much for the idea that everyone loves weddings.” To which I replied, outraged, “NO ONE likes weddings! The only people who like weddings are the people that have nothing invested in weddings and nothing to do with the planning. Everyone else would rather not be there.”

Should be good times tonight. And just think! I'll have video footage of it all.

Today, Friday November 3, is the last day for early voting in Texas. Polls close at 7 PM guys -- you can pretty much go to any Randall's and get it done. You don't need a voter registration card -- just a driver's license will work! If you've ever voted in Texas, you are more than likely registered to vote even if you didn't reregister this year.

So please, please go make sure you vote today.

Otherwise, Tuesday is IT! Get your vote heard now and avoid any last minute excuses!

We cannot let Good Hair Perry win. Chris Bell is second in the polls that came out today and every little vote counts -- he is only a few points behind Perry!

Let's upset the Republicans and the lying liars who support them!

I've written 730 words and I'm already discouraged.
This is way harder than last year.

I am going to go take a shower and hope that I can come back into my own good graces post-shower.

How is everyone else doing on Day 1? I am determined to get to 1667 tonight to at least stay on track.